Tuesday, February 16, 2010

The Story of G

“Faith means living with uncertainty - feeling your way through life, letting your heart guide you like a lantern in the dark”

Dan Millman

We never know what is ahead in life no matter how meticulous our plans are. And there are so many variables we can’t control. We can’t even control our own future, rather just have a goal and do our best to achieve it.

This was underlined, underscored and highlighted again and again as we moved through this latest health crisis with our grandson, G. Three weeks ago he became ill with flu like symptoms. Before two days passed he was in the emergency room. Within a few hours he had been transferred by ambulance to Comer Children’s Hospital at the U of Chicago hospital system. A few hours after that he had emergency surgery.

Whew….we all breathed a sigh of relief, crisis handled and over.

But no, wait. Fate had more in store. G. made some valiant efforts at getting better. They had removed all the tubes and he was beginning to eat again. But he had no appetite, and his color was not improving. In fact he was turning a horrid shade of gray.

A long, scary weekend passed as we waited for the surgeon to return from a conference. Oh there were docs looking in on him but no one seemed in charge and assured us that this was normal, that this kind of bowel surgery required time to heal.

However, once the surgeon returned he took one look at G. and rushed him back into surgery. This second surgery resulted in an ileostomy which will ultimately require a third surgery to reverse it and “put all the pieces together again”. This tiny body, 6 years old, now reduced to bones with flesh over them.

Oh I know, kids are so resilient and they heal so much faster than we adults do. But this little one is still struggling. He is, 3 weeks later, still hospitalized, fighting off yet another infection, this one from his pic line. We hope anyway. That would be the best scenario.

So back to best laid plans. After the first surgery my daughter in law was calling babysitters so she could attend some yoga classes that next week. We grandmothers were planning our return flights. G’s father was planning his workweek. G’s brother was planning an outing with his brother and some friends.

And then came the initial turn around. And the canceling of all those plans. G. is teaching us that plans can be made but they must be flexible. We don’t always get what we want and plan for. It is an emotional roller coaster to ride but it is life. It happens in smaller ways every day: we plan a route to work only to find the road is torn up and we must take a detour. We plan to have friends over for dinner and it snows too hard for them to come. We plan to run a marathon and then we get injured during training and it doesn’t happen. It is all just life.

The challenge is, then, how do we handle these challenges? What stuff are we made of? How flexible can we be in the face of what life throws at us?

I am older than most of you and have had my share of challenges. What each of them have taught me is a new tool, a new way of learning how to negotiate these detours in life. I feel fortunate to have the tools I do have. I used color extensively in the form of color breathing, my color sprays, and visualization. I used flower essences and healing creams. I used faith and prayer. I used love and encouragement. I used acceptance and patience. I used all the tools I could think of to get through this myself so that I could be totally present for this family. Most of all, I used my network of wonderful friends to help us through with their prayer and support. Thank you, all of you, for those prayers. They have made all the difference and I could feel your loving hearts reaching out to me in the darkest moments. Thank you so much for being there. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

We do not know the end of this story yet. G. remains in the hospital still, and will be there about a month, best scenario. This is a challenge to the whole family in more ways than one. But one thing I know for sure: prayer helps. You help. And I know that however this unfolds, it is for the highest and best good of all.


  1. I know what it is like to deal with sick kids. Well, not exactly *sick*. My son has autism. It's tough. And every challenge won is just another step before the next battle.

    I hope it all works out for the best. And I hope that whatever is wrong, unlike autism, has a cure.

  2. Love and prayers to you and your family.

  3. Daharja, I can't imagine the challenge of living with autism. There is so much of it lately. G was thought to be autistic for a while. I'm still not sure that he isn't a bit autistic. Still, having an illness where there is a chance for a cure is so much better than living with a condition which will last a lifetime. God bless you and your family.

    Laura Rose, thank you so much. I totally believe in the power of both prayer and love. Bless you.

  4. You have my prayers. We never know what each hour may bring to us. Thank you for your encouragement to this One Woman....

  5. Dearest Diantha,
    You have been on my heart! Your family too. I am so glad to be filled in on all of this. My what a journey you have been on. I love the message you share here and it is SO true. All the best laid plans. We simply must learn how to live in flow, and, as you say so well, use all our spiritual tools as support....

    I love you, my friend and will hold all of you in prayer.

    We are finally here in Fl, though still living out of suitcases. Should have our place next week then will feel more settled. Minimal blogging just trying to keep up stuff..... xo

    e me when you can. i will answer!

  6. Oh, dear Diantha, it is so scary when the little ones get sick like this! And through it all, you are still an inspiration to us all! Keeping you all in my heart!! Love, Silke

  7. Thank you dear Silke. How supportive and kind of you! xo

  8. The seed of life is small, yet when planted and fed it changes and grows. As it sets its roots deep into the earth, it sends up a fragile shoot of green. If kept in the dark the green with fade to an even more fragile yellow. When the Warmth of the Sun hits the, the fragile shoot lifts its head towards the Light, stretching, reaching, gaining strength and courage to grow. When darkness comes and the moon light shines, the little shoot calmly rests, healing, changing, growing strong. Soft cooing of Mourning Doves awake and a New Day begins. May G be Blessed with the Healing Power of Light, gaining strength and health as he struggles in the hospital. May each day bring Hope, Courage, Healing and Love that someday soon G will once again be the strong growing soul he is distend to become. My healing thoughts and prayers go out to you, G and family. May God Bless and keep you and may the Healing Light of Love touch you all, healing minds, bodies and souls. Love and Light, Nina P

  9. Nina, with blessings like that, G will have a wonderful life. Thank you for this beautiful comment. xo

  10. You don't know me, but I found my way to your blog.

    I pray for healing for your little grandson. We had a some scary ups and downs with my daughter in the hospital last year when her Crohn's disease flared...but not nearly as dramatic as what you are all going through (though of course it felt overwhelmingly frightening to us at the time with all the tubes in her and her gray pallor and flesh draped on bones appearance)...

    It sounds as though he is in very good hands, medically and family wise...so much love and light surrounding our little G. May he heal completely and soon...go home and climb trees and dig in the dirt and kick balls and collect rocks and do all the things little boys of six must do.

    gentle steps,

  11. One Woman, I thank you for your prayers. And you are right....things can change in an instant, ready or not....Blessings to you, dear one.


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